Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Germans on the March

Roger,

Like you, I am an aficionado of the exquisite foreign fare the island's many exotic restaurants have to offer. From Ole's Hardtack & Gruel Shack to Gym's COffee Clutch, I enjoy all attempts to prepare food for me, as long as they don't get too uppity with the spices.

Imagine my shock while walking past the doomed-to-failure Megaplex-That-Everyone-Hates when I saw a new German restaurant opening right beside it: Burger Meister. (I think it means "Master Of The Burger"!) I happily perused their menu. Burger Shyster is more like it! $8 for a chili dog? How can our elected officials let such thievery go on within the city limits?

If it weren't for that other great German place, Der Wienerschnitzel, I would seriously question our fair island's relationship with the Hun. Why, I can get almost 10 chili dogs there for the price of one at Mister Burger! It's also much better than that Spice Camper place near the hippie prune store, and a far smaller chance of bagpipes!

To arms, to arms,
Fletcher Binghampton

1 comment:

Dave Williamson said...

Der Liner-Schnitzel is more like it, who has time to stand in that line of ungrateful teenagers? I can't believe you would leave out Alameda's historic gem the Pampered Pup. As the name suggests, these folks know how to get you a dog without making you stand around in your schnitzel. (see that, I made a funny! get it? It's really funny.)

Somebody should tell Mayor Johnson that the lines at Der House of Schnitzel are depleting the city of her beloved sales-tax, which everyone but me and Doug deHaan is too stupid to understand is worthless. We shouldn't even bother to collect it.