Alameda Daily Noose Salutes Latest Addition to Historic Landmark List

The Alameda Daily Noose and I were the only representatives of the major news media present this morning at a dedication ceremony for the oldest known shopping cart in Alameda. The cart has resided in the same watery location (pictured above) since the year that the first supermarket opened in Alameda, and as such is subject to the rules governing preservation of historic structures. Any attempt to subdivide or make an addition to the cart would have to conform to stringent requirements regarding materials and design, in order to ensure a historically accurate cheap, flimsy appearance.

All changes will have to be reviewed by the City Council, the Planning Board, and an otherwise-totally-biased special ad-hoc subcommittee thereof, fairly balanced out by citizen-members of the Alameda Cultural Heritage Education Society. Each meeting will feature extensive provisions for unlimited public comments from neighbors of the cart, including—but most certainly not limited to—home video montages, spoken-word pieces, original musical compositions, mixed-media collage, and a newly introduced interpretive dance category.