Whew! That Was a Not-So-Close One!

Well, the results are in, and the outcome couldn't be any less ambiguous. By an astoundingly overwhelming 85% to 15% margin, Alamedans have rejected neighborhood libraries, new schools, jobs, open space, sports fields, bike paths, retail, and more frequent bus service, thereby averting Alamedageddon.

Measure B opposition is not just about a couple of Robots, a few Squirrels, or a Bagpipe or two—it's about Zeppelin traffic and parking in front of people's houses on the island of Alameda, with limited access and no viable plans for future bridges, tubes, or Zeppelin mooring masts.

Ridiculous Buck Rogers concepts like neighborhood libraries, robot maids, new schools, flying cars, jobs, time travel, open space, teleportation, sports fields, force fields, bike paths, faster-than-light-speed travel, retail, more frequent bus service, and vast networks of interconnected computers will do nothing to free us from the plague of Zeppelins and rogue parkers that threatens to destroy us all. In the face of all that scary, scary change, the only Right-Thinking remedy is to do nothing. Therefore, let us never forget the clear message of the defeat of Measure B: "Doing something is bad."