Scoop! of Revelations: Mayor Johnson's "Robotic" Call Now on the U-Tubes

Editor's Comments:

On Thursday, many Alamedans received a telephone call from Alameda's lame duck mayor, Beverly Johnson. The Alameda Daily Noose and I soon realized that this was no ordinary phone call, but rather a shocking and surprising revelation of our so-called mayor's shocking hidden secret. We have once again scooped all of the other major news media by obtaining the following exclusive, 100% accurate dramatization of Thursday's "Robotic" call to Alameda residents, which we have posted on the U-Tubes so that all Right-Thinking Alamedans, even those crazy kids today, can see it for themselves:



Johnson courted Alameda voters by stating on her campaign in the mayoral election that she was a "good" "person" who could be "trusted." Her signs included the slogan, "Trust Me, I'm Not an Evil Robot." However, as the "Robotic" call and our hard-hitting dramatization thereof prove, our so-called mayor is, in fact, an Evil Robot bent on destroying Alameda with some kind of "Force Fields" emanating from a secret base cleverly disguised as a Tartan-Oriented Development.

The Alameda Daily Noose and I suspected all along that the mayor is an Evil Robot, but we did not mention it publicly for fear of creating a panic. Well, the time for panic has finally arrived. Today at noon, there will be a demonstration at City Hall protesting the mayor's plan to build a secret base at Alameda Point as a launching pad for her army of Robotic minions to enslave the human race.

We hope that this will be only the first of many demonstrations against the mayor's diabolical plan with increasing numbers of protesters in future weeks to insure that the Evil Robots will be defeated in the upcoming Apocalyptic Battle for Truth, Justice, and the Alamedan Way. We hear it's scheduled for November.

Roger Grumbel