The Alameda Daily Noose and I are pleased to announce that our relentless coverage of our soon-to-be-award-winning status has paid off! And when we say "paid off," we mean to the tune of roughly 910,150 U.S. dollars, depending on the exchange rate. Here is the official letter that we received with the happy news that we are now soon-to-be-almost-millionaires:
From: Dell@ms1.vianet.caThe Alameda Daily Noose and I are honored to be chosen for this season's award. We are so eager that we simply can't wait for some slowpoke courier to bring us what we so richly deserve, so we're sending Miss Graham-Cracker our bank account number right away. We only hope that we have figured out how to spend all that money by the time we win the award for the next season!
Sent: Tuesday, September 2, 2008 3:18 AM
Subject: PROMOTIONAL AWARD
Dell Award Notification
We are delighted to inform you that you are one
of the THREE LUCKY WINNERS whose e-mail address
won the sum payout of 500,000 pounds.(Five
Hundred Thousand Pounds Sterlings Only) in the
DELL ELECTRONICS SEASONAL AWARD 2008.
Please be informed that all participants were
selected through a computer ballot system drawn
from over 30,000 company and 50,000,000
individual email addresses and names from all
over the world. To file in for your claims,
contact our claim's agent with your
information as provided below:
Age:.... Occupation:.... Nationality:.......
Residential Address: .........
How Do You Wish To Receive Your Funds? 1. Cheque
Delivery by Courier 2. Direct Bank Transfer
Mrs Maureen Graham(Information Officer)