Ozzie Luffers Defends Buck Schaat Against Deeply Distubed Elaine Hollandaise

Editor,

So, who made Elaine Hollandaise the arbiter of what is or is not "irresponsible" in a noosepaper? She says she was "disturbed" by Buck Schaat's letter dealing with the legitimate annoyances of Squirrels. It sounds as if she thinks that you shouldn't even have published it.

Those of us who have some sense realize that Mr. Schaat's references to violence were of a purely metaphorical nature. It should be obvious that no-one would actually shoot Squirrels, much as we might like to get the little rats back for what they do to our quality of life. Clearly, when Mr. Schaat listed the most appropriate weapons to use in our endless battle against Squirrels, and supplied a Squirrel-killing simulator video game, he was being ironic.

I was laughing out loud as I read Mr. Schaat's drily witty send-up of those who advocate extreme measures for dealing with Squirrels when we could easily solve the problem with a moratorium on trees, plus some judicious chopping. I am offended that Ms. Hollandaise could imagine that Mr. Schaat's letter was in some way offensive, and I don't think that anyone with her poor sense of comic effect should be writing any more letters to the Alameda Daily Noose. If she does, I certainly hope you will not print them. That would be deeply disturbing indeed.

Ozzie Luffers

Editor's Comments:

The Alameda Daily Noose and I have a policy of publishing every single letter that we receive, especially if it supports Right-Thinking or demonstrates the foolishness of those who are not Right-Thinking Alamedans.