Thursday, July 12, 2007

Rip-Off! "Fray by the Bay" a Huge Disappointment

The Alameda Daily Noose and I were so excited as we entered Alameda Hospital last night, our V.I.P. passes in hand, ready to witness the "Fray by the Bay." Our hearts sank as we realized that the old gymnasium looked nothing like we remembered; in fact, it had been so heavily remodeled that it looked just like any other conference room one might find on the first floor of a hospital. We looked around, but the steel cage was nowhere to be found. Instead of seeing Brenda Karl and Elaine Hollandaise face off in the smackdown of the century, all we saw were two ladies having a boring discussion about something that had absolutely nothing to do with Squirrels. They didn't hit each other at all, or even make any attempt to wrestle! As they prattled on and on about housing or density or something, we quickly nodded off.

When we awoke, everyone was gone, except for a few disgruntled gentlemen who had placed bets on the match. Tempers flared, and eventually all of the bets were reluctantly returned to the bettors. To look on the bright side, however, since no sporting event actually occurred, nobody had to worry about breaking any laws against sports betting. Of course, the Alameda Daily Noose and I are still out our $50 each for V.I.P. passes, and boy, are we miffed about that. What a colossal rip-off!


Anonymous said...

I don't know who you are, but I have just found your website and I am laughing so hard that I am crying! Bravo!

Anonymous said...

I have to disagree with Miss Anonymous, if that even is her real name. The threat of Squirrels is no laughing matter, and although it may be very polite and gentle to hold a debate on the issue with "rules" and "time limits" and "no violence," that's not how we do things in Alameda!