Oh, the Humanity! Lon Geddoff Burned Up by Imminent Zeppelin Parking Disaster

Editor,

Thank you for your explosive exposé on the Zeppelin parking nightmare about to be visited upon our Treasured Island. I know those ponderous silver gas-bags look harmless enough, but if we start mooring them with some kind of cable and providing community access, it will allow tens—maybe even dozens—of citizens to get on board for ridiculous flights of fancy on a regular basis. Once that happens, there's no telling what kind of disaster could result if one of those drifting gas-bags should collide with something solid and well-grounded!

As soon as that new theater opens, the city is going to be bumper-to-bumper with Zeppelins. They will not only be tying up there, but also in all of the surrounding neighborhoods. I, for one, do not want Zeppelins parking on top of my house. That T.V. antenna I put up back when you first started broadcasting your show would give them just the opportunity they're looking for, but my roof is no place for people to be tromping on and off a big airship. That would really burn me up!

Now I'm not an unreasonable N.I.M.B.Y.—Not In My Back Yard. My back yard is far too small for a Zeppelin to land in, anyway. I have no problem with them as long as they are N.A.M.B.Y.—Not Above My Back Yard.

Lon Geddoff