Green Living by Janet Marchant: A Totally Organic Heating Solution

If you have your finger on the pulse of the planet, as I do, then you have undoubtedly heard that coal is making a comeback as a heating fuel. Now, you're probably saying to yourself, "Gee, I wish I could save all that money by burning coal, but I'm concerned about the effect on the environment." Well, I have some good news for you!

As anyone who's been to the grocery store lately can tell you, anything marked "organic" is wonderful and good for you and for the planet. But what does "organic" really mean? According to my trusty Webster's dictionary, "organic" means "of, relating to, or containing carbon compounds." You can imagine my surprise, then, when I looked up "coal" and found that it is "a piece of glowing carbon"! In other words, coal is totally organic, and therefore good for the planet, so the more you burn, the better.

Of course, burning coal can be a bit messy, due to the coal dust and ash, but this too has a silver lining. You and your family will have hours of enjoyment re-enacting scenes from "Mary Poppins," taking turns tending the furnace and then playing the role of that lucky, loveable Cockney chimney-sweep!