Monday, February 23, 2009

Grumbel and Alameda Daily Noose Accurately Predicted All 24 Oscar® Winners

Last week, in a private conference held in my living room, the Alameda Daily Noose and I accurately predicted all 24 Oscar® winners in this year's awards ceremony presented by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. This marks our 60th consecutive year of completely accurate predictions, and the fact that we have yet to announce our predictions to the general public ahead of time does not detract in the least from this momentous accomplishment. After all, we have an obligation to keep our 100% accurate predictions secret; otherwise, they would wreak havoc with the odds placed on the winners by those upstanding professionals in the bookmaking business.

So, without further ado, here is our list of 24 Oscar® predictions for yesterday's awards:

  1. Actor in a leading role: Sean Penn

  2. Actor in a supporting role: Heath Ledger

  3. Actress in a leading role: Kate Winslet

  4. Actress in a supporting role: Penélope Cruz

  5. Animated Feature Film: Wall-E

  6. Art Direction: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

  7. Cinematography: Paul Blart: Moviscop

  8. Costume Design: The Duchess

  9. Directing: Paul Blart: DeMille Cop

  10. Documentary feature: Man on Wire

  11. Documentary short: Smile Pinki

  12. Film editing: Paul Blart: Montage Cop

  13. Foreign language film: Departures

  14. Makeup: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

  15. Music (Score): Paul Blart: Maestro Cop

  16. Music (Song): "Jai Ho" from Paul Blart: Mumbai Cop

  17. Best Picture: Paul Blart: Mail Cop

  18. Short film (animated): La Maison en Petits Cubes

  19. Short film (live action): Spielzeugland (Toyland)

  20. Sound editing: The Dark Knight

  21. Sound mixing: Paul Blart: Mult Cop

  22. Visual effects: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

  23. Writing (Adapted screenplay): Paul Blart: Manuscript Cop

  24. Writing (Original screenplay): Milk


Anonymous said...

I logged onto this site for the first time only because I saw it on Alamedans. I am appalled at how mean-spirited it is. Not sure who runs this blog, but your attempt to put down fellow Alamedans is more of a reflection on your character than anything else. Hopefully, you will come to realize that your time could be better spent building community rather than tearing it apart.

Anonymous said...

I logged onto this site to express my anger and frustration with other Alamedans putting other Alamedans down all the time. Why just the other day, I heard someone talking smack about Roger Grumbel and his Alameda Daily Noose. How insensitive and appalling! How could anyone be so base and low as to criticize our very own exclusive, award winning daily noose? I'm tired of these people tearing our community apart and saying negative things about people. Seems these bunch of baseless scumbags make these comments and then are too chicken to even reveal their identity.

Yours in anger,
Coho Jerkins