Green Living by Janet Marchant: Spicking and Spanning, Bluing and Greening Alameda Point

I keep hearing people complain about the need for toxic clean-up at Alameda Point, and let me tell you, I am all for it! There's no reason why that piece of land shouldn't be spick and span by the time the Navy transfers it to the City of Alameda. With just a few simple steps, the Navy could easily return Alameda Point to its former pristine condition, in no time at all.

Now, the ground is what needs cleaning most of all, so let's start there. Based on my own knowledge of house cleaning, I would recommend that the Navy use Mop & Glo to get rid of that pesky radium glow. Not only does it clean away complex hydrocarbons, Mop & Glo leaves an unbeatable shine!

I understand that there's also some contamination in the water at Alameda Point. Well, you can't go wrong with Ty-D-Bol. A bottle of that miracle cleaner in my toilet tank keeps the water fresh and blue with every flush. All the Navy needs to do is hang a container of Ty-D-Bol in the Seaplane Lagoon, which would also be a convenient spot for the Ty-D-Bol man to dock his boat.

Once they've tidied up the soil and the water, that just leaves the air. I have a perfect solution to that, and one that takes full advantage of the wonderful historic resources at the old Air Station. Those big, empty hangars would be a great place to hang a bunch of those giant air fresheners that give you a pure, pine-fresh scent without the annoyances and hazards of actual trees.

These three simple steps would leave us with an Alameda Point that's clean enough to eat off of, so why should we settle for anything less? I hope my helpful hints will inspire the Navy to start their base clean-up tomorrow!